If you found yourself being constantly monitored, demeaned, or questioned by someone how would it make you feel? 

The answer for most people to this question today is probably different than it was just a generation ago as people have grown accustomed to toxic behavior in relationships. In her article “What is a Toxic Relationship,” Elizabeth Scott, PhD defines a toxic relationship as “one that makes you feel unsupported, misunderstood, demeaned, or attacked.”

It is important to understand that toxic relationships are negative and often possessive relationships. To me, it seems that half of the world has a toxic relationship, and stays in because they don’t recognize it as toxic. From what I see around me, this seems to be common. 

In society today, we have normalized toxic relationships. All around the world it seems that the topic has been brushed off and swept away as non-important.  What you do in your personal relationship is not anyone’s business, yes; but it is really important to take into consideration that toxic relationships ruin mental health. In the article, Scott focuses on mental illnesses such as, bipolar disorder and major depression, talking about how harmful it can be in a toxic relationship with these illnesses. The negative behavior is what they are vulnerable to, and can weaken them in a major way. It can also affect those who are not diagnosed by pushing them into weakening their mental health.

Usually a toxic relationship is pushed away by society because it’s not talked about  enough, people are never taught how to treat their partner in a relationship; there aren’t instructions on how or what to do. Therefore, society does not know what exactly hurts and drains others. Communication is what most say is important in relationships and while it is a huge part, I think it is patience. 

Relationships require lots of communication and patience between both people. Although there aren’t instructions on how a relationship should be or how one works, there are some behaviors that are absolute poison to a relationship that young people in particular should be taught. You can improve your relationship by identifying a toxic relationship and create a healthy one with the knowledge you have of a toxic one. By starting a healthy relationship it will really protect your mental health, and having a healthy mindset is a big improvement to your mental health overall. A toxic relationship can really take a toll on your mental health, draining you. 

Social media has a big role in the normalization of toxic relationships, as sites like Instagram, Twitter, and Tik Tok often show celebrities who have been and are in toxic relationships and make it a joke. They do this because it catches peoples’ attention and their goal is to grab the audience. 

A clear example of this is Blueface and his relationship with Chrisean Rock who have made their relationship pretty public. Their public fights, which involve her attacking him, are spread all over social media and, in the end, do harm to both of them. During and after incidents between them, he goes live to his followers – over a million – and this large platform allows people to see his behavior and the fact that he puts up with such toxic behavior. Much of this audience is adolescents, who cannot be benefiting from this. In fact, adolescents gain an accepting perspective towards toxic relationships when celebrities they look up to or admire are in one. They might think it’s okay or normal to go through such hardships and rough relationships. z

Instead of showing good moments and appropriate behavior that exists between them, celebrities overshare their relationships’ hardships; and while that gets them followers, it does no one any real good. 

Adolescents need to learn about positive relationships. Parents should encourage healthy behavior and it should be talked about more by counselors, parents, and even on social media platforms. With all this information, hopefully the toxic behavior can be eliminated.