Being at home during quarantine has really forced me to reflect on my four years at Paint Branch High School. I started to think how my senior year was being cut short, and how I felt like I was leaving so many things unfinished. And naturally, I began to get hard on myself. I started to go back and forth in my mind about accomplishment, which means “something that has been achieved successfully.” I began thinking: What have I accomplished so far in my life? 

Something that has bothered me for years is feeling that I have no natural talent. I’m not super smart or exceptionally athletic like a lot of my peers. There isn’t one thing that sets me apart from everyone else my age. I’m pretty much average at everything that I do. I don’t absolutely fail at everything, but there are always people who are better than I am. Because of this, I feel defeated easily and give up (I don’t always have the best work ethic either, which doesn’t help.) But then I get mad at myself because I know I have so much potential to be great. What is really hard about feeling “talentless” is that even when I do try my hardest, others who don’t seem to have to work as hard come along and earn the opportunities just because they’re naturally better. Then I feel really disappointed, and at times insecure. Sometimes I just sit and wonder why I wasn’t born with a special gift. Why couldn’t I be extremely smart, or artsy, or athletic? These are the questions that can sometimes put me in a really bad place.

For anyone who can relate or feels the same way, I have some advice. One quote that I like a lot is “comparison is the thief of joy.” To me, this means to stop comparing your progress to the progress of people around you. We are all on a different journey, and trust me, your time will come. I believe that we were all put on this earth for a purpose, and if you don’t feel fulfilled in your life yet, that is absolutely okay. Maybe you just haven’t found your niche yet. 

Lastly, I want to say, don’t be so hard on yourself! Stop beating yourself up. You are special and unique; even when you don’t feel like it. There is nobody else in this world exactly like you. So don’t second guess yourself, just be patient and enjoy this journey called life!